Internet Movie Database
is the best movie site by a long shot.
If you're looking for a review and IMDB doesn't have it,
try the Movie Review Query Engine.
Links to over 25,000 titles!
The Movie Sounds Page
has tons of movie sound clips you can listen
download. Here's one from
The Usual Suspects.
Speaking of movie sounds,
George Lucas's Skywalker Sound site will
take you through
The Making of a Movie Soundtrack
If visual effects are more your speed,
The Oracle of Bacon at Virginia
Time Magazine picked this as one of the ten
best Web sites
of 1996. And they were right on the money.
No explanation could
really do it justice. Try it, you'll love
it. Has the Mayor
ever misled you before?
All-Movie Guide will let you search by Film Title,
Artist, Key Word, Country, Genre, even the
Mood you're in.
If Mr. Cranky doesn't turn your crank, maybe
will turn out to be more your speed.
The Movie Cliches List
Ah, Mr. Bond, welcome, come in. Let me
show you my entire evil plan and then put
in a death machine that doesn't work.
Read any good movies lately?
Take a flip through
Movie Scripts Home Page.
Tons of movie stuff. Current reviews, links
soundtracks, hard-to-find videos for sale & lots more.
has tons of short films online.
You can also see all of Joe Cartoon's
(Frog in a Blender) films there.
The Movie Poster Warehouse
Current movie reviews, one-minute movie reviews
searchable database of Ebert reviews from
1985 to the present.
Give CineMachine the title of a movie and it'll
go out and find more reviews than you can
Well, it'll find a lot of reviews.
|Famous film actor Michael
Caine's real name is Maurice Joseph Micklewhite. He changed his name to
Michael Scott early in his career acting in small provincial theatres in
England. He changed his name again after moving to London. "I was
on the phone with my agent and he told me there was another actor with
the same name and I needed a new name, right then, so I looked around --
I was in a phone booth in Leicester Square -- and across the street I
saw this movie marquee and The Caine Mutiny was playing, so I said
Caine, make it Michael Caine."
Actual English subtitles
used in Chinese films.
I am damn unsatisfied to
be killed in this way.
Fatty, you with your thick face have hurt my instep.
Gun wounds again?
Same old rules: no eyes, no groin.
A normal person wouldn't steal pituitaries.
Damn, I'll burn you into a BBQ chicken!
Take my advice, or I'll spank you without pants.
Who gave you the nerve to get killed here?
Quiet or I'll blow your throat up.
You always use violence. I should've ordered glutinous rice
I'll fire aimlessly if you don't come out!
You daring lousy guy.
Beat him out of recognizable shape!
I have been scared shitless too much lately.
I got knife scars more than the number of your leg's hair!
Beware! Your bones are going to be disconnected.
The bullets inside are very hot. Why do I feel so cold?
How can you use my intestines as a gift?
This will be of fine service for you, you bag of the scum. I am
sure you will not mind that I remove your manhoods and leave them out on
the dessert flour for your aunts to eat.
Yah-hah, evil spider woman! I have captured you by the short
rabbits and can now deliver you violently to your gynecologist for a
Greetings, large black person. Let us not forget to form a team
up together and go into the country to inflict the pain of our karate
feets on some ass of the giant lizard person.
A few of The Mayor's
favourite movie titles:
Sh! The Octopus
Bela Lugosi Meets a Brooklyn Gorilla
The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who
Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies
Naked Super Witches of the Rio Amore
Billy The Kid vs. Dracula
Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter
I Bought a Vampire Motorcycle
Rat Fink A Boo Boo
Night of the Day of the Dawn of the Son of the
Bride of the Return of the Terror: The Revenge of
the Terror of the Attack of the Evil, Mutant,
Hellbound, Flesh-Eating, Subhumanoid
Living Dead, Part 2
Look Back in Angora
Samurai Vampire Bikers from Hell
When Women Played Ding Dong
Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-A-Rama
Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death
Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers
Werewolves on Wheels
Zadar! Cow from Hell
Rock and Roll Wrestling Women vs. The Aztec Mummy
Lunatic Frog Women
Sugar Hill and her Zombie Hit Men
Mutant on the Bounty
Dr. Otto and the Riddle of the Gloom Beam
War is Menstrual Envy
Pucker Up and Bark Like a Dog
Cat in the Brain
The Harlem Globetrotters on Gilligan's Island
Rock and the Money-Hungry Party Girls
Petey Wheatstraw, The Devil's Son-in-law
Saga of the Viking Women and their Voyage
to the Waters of the Great Sea Serpent
Striptease Baby Dolls from Cleveland Meet the Unkillables
What Would You Say to Some Spinach?
(aka A Nice Plate of Spinach)
Frankenstein's Great-Aunt Tillie
Never Torture a Duckling
A Nymphoid Barbarian in Dinosaur Hell
Yodeling Makes Your Lederhosen Itch
Teenage Catgirls in Heat
Nymphoid Barbarians in Dinosaur Hell
The Mayor's favourite theater marquee:
Boa War is Mad
This item was stolen from John Tebbutt's Video
Vulture column in Calgary's Fast Forward magazine. It is a description
of a movie called Boa War is Mad which was dubbed into Chinese and
then back into English.
Boa War is Mad: Good grief, where to start with this one? It's got
one of the most nonsensical titles I've ever come across, and the
DVD sleeve is a massive collision of random clip art. The illustration
includes the menacing eyes from the Cape Fear (1991) poster, a big
snake and two armoured goblins glaring at one another over the hilt
of an upside-down, two-handed sword. Pop open the box, and you'll
find that the disc bears a completely different full-colour illustration,
consisting of tne snake from Anaconda (1997) and close-ups of Uma
Thurman and Alicia Silverstone wearing their Poison Ivy and Batgirl
masks from Batman and Robin (1997). Both images proudly bear the Boa
War is Mad title, which you've probably guessed isn't the real title
of anything, anywhere. Wait, it gets better. According to the synopsis
on the back of the box, Boa War is Mad is about a talented young singer
make it big in New York City. That's right, the synopsis is taken
from the "Grammy Award wineer" Mariah Carey vehicle, Glitter
(2001)! Could there possibly be anything else on the box to further
obfuscate the film's actual identity? Well, yes. The credits are from
Scarface (1983), the cast of Halloween III (1982) is credited and
the cover blurb reads "The war Happenning In the Space Mangky
Humanning". Wow. This movie could be anything. What it is (sorry
to spoil the mystery) is a silly little alien conspiracy flick entitled
Force (a.k.a, Interceptors) (1999) starring French kickboxer Olivier
Gruner. In the first few seconds of the film, a nuclear explosion
obliterates Yellowknife, Canada. (This event occurs in a 1993 flashback,
and it explains why there is no place called Yellowknife anymore.
Hey, wait a minute) Then Gruner and his inept team of alien experts
investigate a downed spaceship in Mexico and get stalked by a space
monster. Government agent Brad Dourif hangs around in a control room,
waiting to nuke the area if they fail. Meanwhile, Ernie Hudson (you
know, the black Ghostbuster) stares at the big air-force map and looks
concerned. So, what aren't there any of in this film about snakes,
goblins, supervillains and Mariah Carey? Snakes, goblins, supervillains
and Mariah Carey, that's what.